A Crash Course in Confidence

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Erin is one of my sisters and has graciously written a guest post about how she too is a firework in progress. I am so blessed to call her family; we became sisters when my dad married her mom when we were kids and we’ve grown incredibly close throughout the years. She is an actor living in New York City and one of the most active, confident, and positive people I know. She has developed an incredibly strong sense of self in a career where rejection is common and physical appearance can dictate whether or not you’re hired. She has followed her dream since she was a little girl and has been in movies, television shows, commercials, radio and print ads, and on Broadway. The city is her treadmill and she has always led a highly active lifestyle by walking everywhere she can. Through every step of my journey, Erin has been cheering me on with her boundless enthusiasm and her unwavering belief in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself. She has always led by example and has taught me how to have faith in myself. Her healthy lifestyle, passion for acting and unwavering optimism is an inspiration to me. I’m sure it will be an inspiration to you too!

In her free time, Erin loves cooking and yoga...usually not at the same time.
At home in New York, finding zen wherever she can

Hello fellow fireworks in progress! I’m Courtney’s sister, Erin, and am thrilled and honored to be a guest contributor and look forward to sharing a city gal’s perspective on how to live a healthy and happy life. I moved to NYC 16 years ago (GASP! I guess this officially makes me a New Yorker?!) to attend New York University’s Tisch School of the Arts, where I majored in Drama. Acting was always my passion from the time I was a little girl, so it was bit of a no-brainer I would follow this path. While the road hasn’t always been clear and obstacle-free, the journey has been a rewarding one thus far, and I feel so blessed to be able to call myself a working actor in a city that both rewards and challenges those pursuing artistic careers.

Erin was born to be on stage and has been acting since she was a little girl. Her career has taken her around the world and it's always exciting to see where acting will take her next.
Erin was born to be on stage and has been acting since she was a little girl. Her career has taken her around the world and it’s always exciting to see where acting will take her next.

The biggest question people ask me all the time (in addition to “Was that you in that Robitussin Commercial?”) is how I handle the constant rejection. Now, I’d be lying if I said I had an easy answer for how I’ve lasted this long, but like anything good in life and worth fighting for, it takes hard work, perseverance and a positive attitude. The happier you are with yourself, the more confidence you exude, and the easier it is to let the “no’s” roll off your back without shedding too many tears. I may not be able to control whether or not I get the job, but I can control the way I handle the entire process. And let me tell you, it feels a whole lot better to take a deep breath and move on, versus letting rejection eat you up.

Erin was recently in a Robitussin commercial! It was nice to be able to see her so often!
Erin was recently in a Robitussin commercial! It was nice to be able to see her so often!

How though, can we get to this place where rejection is no more than a mild inconvenience versus a life-shattering occurrence? One of the best pieces of advice I was ever given goes something like this: Don’t believe the person who tells you you’re the most amazing actor/(insert your profession here) they’ve ever seen. Because if you believe that person, you’ll also believe the person who tells you you’re crap. Period. Don’t put all your marbles into any one person’s faith or lack of faith in you. Have faith in yourself and let that be your guiding principle. ALWAYS. If you know your own self-worth, talent and beauty, then you don’t need anyone else’s validation and this, my friends, is the key to letting go. To letting that rejection blip on by and to moving on to life’s next challenge.

Erin ran a 5k to benefit the Bronx Zoo elephants a few weeks ago. Fitness for a great cause!
Erin ran a 5k to benefit the Bronx Zoo elephants a few weeks ago. Fitness for a great cause!

In order to get to this place of self worth and extreme confidence, it takes constant work and care. As an actor, my body is my instrument and one that needs to be cared for every day. This means, making healthy food choices and always finding the time for exercise, even if it just means walking from audition to audition instead of taking the subway or doing some yoga before bed. It doesn’t take a gym or expensive equipment…it just takes dedication and open eyes. And I promise you…the moment you start believing in yourself, the world will be watching and waiting to put your name up in lights.

Through thick and thin (literally) Erin has always been there for me and has always cheered me on. That's what sisters are for!
Through thick and thin (literally) Erin has been there for me and has always cheered me on. I don’t know where this journey would have taken me if I didn’t have her by my side. She’s my number one cheerleader. That’s what sisters are for!

How do you maintain faith and confidence in yourself? Who helps to remind you when you forget?

Courtney Wienslaw

My blog chronicles my 90-pound weight loss transformation and encourages people to live a healthy, happy, fit, and balanced lifestyle.

4 Comments
  1. If we believe, we can make it happen. I wrote a piece on saying I can instead of I can’t. If we really want to make it happen, we will say we can and put in all the hard effort and commitment. Great post and best of luck :)

  2. Sisters are great support systems–they know you better than most people and can see when you need some extra encouragement–sometimes before you can!
    I think it is essential to create your own support system (sister or no sister) when you set out to make a lifestyle change. Your friends/family can’t help you if you don’t tell them what you’re trying to do. Sometimes it is letting go of your pride and just saying “I need help making a change.” For me, it was telling my best friends and closest relatives that I felt badly inside and wanted to be healthier. I was so scared of their reactions. Would they pity me? Would they now pay more attention to what I ate at family dinners? Would they realize how unhappy I was? But when I sent an email asking for their support, they all just encouraged me and mentioned how they, too, wanted to change. Letting go–like Erin said…that’s the key!
    Love you and I look forward to your blog posts. Keep it coming girlfriend! xoxoxo

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